It is always challenging to go against specific phrases or "sayings" that we are used to hearing all our lives. The truth is, there is a time and place for everything. However, this being a blog about relationships means that sometimes, to be successful, we must look at things from a critical lens. It would be not very interesting for us to repeat the same actions and expect different results. This post explores the phrase, "The devil you know is better than the angel you do not know" or "Better the devil you know than the devil you don't", hence, the title. Please understand what I am saying because what the phrase means is that, what/whom you have or know, is better than what/whom you do not have or know, which often makes sense.
President Harry Truman's baseball coach, Wooden, had a favorite saying: "It's what you learn after you know it all, that counts." I first encountered this phrase about two years ago while reading “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People” by Stephen Covey. This discovery was, in fact, very enlightening because it raised an urge within me to learn. The statement is so profound because it tells us that to move onto something else from what we already know, we need to learn more. Let's explore.
We are all comfortable with the term “angel”, because we almost always attribute it to something good. When we think of an angel, we think of a messenger sent from God, descriptively, a divine being with wings and halos, often symbolizing goodness, purity, and righteousness. Additionally, most of us think of angels as excellent and beneficial. In relationships, we define people who are good, supportive, and there for us in times of need, as some form of angel, because they bring a solution for, or an answer to a prayer from God.
We, however, do not look at the devil the same. Our world typically associates the devil with evil and as one who opposes God's will for us in many cases. The devil represents chaos, darkness, temptations, and deception, which all act against our best interests. If we agree that words have meaning, please review the phrase in question. I submit that the devil you know (once you describe him as such) is still the devil, and in no way will the devil have your best interest at heart. So what good is it to hold on to such things or people?
The next person you meet can be a devil too. What, then? You now know more about the characteristics of the “devil”, so, not only can you now identify it faster, but you can also avoid it altogether until you find your angel. Do not hold on to what you know is crippling to you and your well-being. If anyone or anything is against the will of God for your life, they are not suitable for you. Sure, the next person you meet may be worse, but they also could be better. Why give up on the opportunity to be loved, adored, and respected because of fear, accepting the things you know in your heart are detrimental to you?
Relationships are complicated, so they need work. Therefore, anyone willing to put in the work cannot be described as a devil because that is not an attribute of the devil. Do not let the fear of being single or lonely cause you to spend time in relationships that do not build you up. Being familiar with someone's actions that continue to harm you is not the best option for you and should not be an option at all.
Remember, you deserve a stable, safe, and enjoyable relationship.
